musings of a born troubled soul

musings of a born troubled soul - 1

hi... I dunno if I am writing a letter or addressing someone standing there! I am just perhaps...no its a monologue I guess... but then it is you, my blog, and it is me. I am sorry. I am feeling as if we have only a relation till I am depressed and I have no one there to talk to. But it isn't really. The truth is, I am lost at present. So many things are going and I am not able to find any satisfactory answer or say, I am not able to talk to myself about it. Yes.. that's it. You know at this moment, what I would love to do, to have this home with me for whole day, to start a novel, to pen down my thoughts. I guess, I know what's wrong with me. I am not able to pen down my thoughts in form of a story or poem. So many thoughts, emotions, experiences have piled up, and I need to express them that way. But I don't find solitude. If I ask myself, what I did today, gawd, I didn't do anything that gives pure satisfaction. No, yes, I welcomed guests, I spend time listening to their stories. I called up an old friend. Besides that? Nothing productive. That's so irritating. You want to do so much, but you end up in doing Nothing. "Nothing comes out of nothing".
All I know right now is - either I want to talk to someone - heart to heart talk -Infinitely. Or I want to write- till I write something that satisfies me.
The End.

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Just b-e-l-i-e-v-e!

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