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S.J - why don't the flowers bloom ?

"It has been so bitter lovely ! He came like wind, I didn't see it came, when it came, I felt it, though it may be there but I can't see it, I am panicked."
"Are you talking to the wind?"
"Raabela ! I wish wind would hear it... but I can't keep it to myself any longer."
"Jeanie ! don't lose your heart, sit here, you are not well...come, please do..."
She moved to the bench, she looked so tired, she began to speak as if she were talking to herself, " I would do as you say Raabela, I would... " She closed her eyes tightly. Opened them and fixed her gaze at the horizon. It was too cold and nature didn't seem too welcoming, it had covered up itself under a white-hazel blanket.
"You know Raabi, when I was in college I would imagine myself at an isolated place, where I would sit down and look at a thing for a long time, I remember that feeling strongly, I wanted to reach at a point where nothing would affect me, no sorrow, no happiness, it was the aloofness from every material thing. And one day, it happened, yea..I lived it... but people around me asked me to break this silence, they wanted to take away this hollowness out of me...they wanted to help me... why don't the flowers bloom Raabi...why can't I find the words for what I feel... I trusted first, I trusted second, I doubted third and I lost with fourth, I don't trust...myself anymore... Rabbi take me away from this earth, from this world, where no man lives, no one lives, where I can be with the land, the sky, the stars and trees, where I can find some peace... I want nothing and no one...no one who sees it in me a tragedy... I hear a flute...Raabi "

She collapses. Raabela hopes she never wakes up. She hopes the flute voice takes her away, where she always wanted to be...

photo: reflection of tree and dock in a lake

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