Monday, July 25, 2011

Surrounded by Signs

I have always been mesmerized by signs and their secret way to communicate with us. Signs may be very obvious, real, visible and functioning as a warning for example , you happen to witness an insignificant accident just when you begin to start your bike and later you actually meet with an accident. It may it your hit your mind that the accident you had witnessed before going out was a kind of sign. Another kind of sign which is more subtle but strong can be a dream. If, out of no where you begin to have the dreams of accidents and if you happen to ignore the warnings and on the same date or day or with the same person you really meet with an accident , wouldn’t you feel a shiver of shock?
It seems, a mysterious force is always around us, giving us signs and suggesting its presence. But this force sometimes can be more subtle, unobvious and less visible. Or may be this is a force of our soul, our conscious – sub-conscious mind rather than any ambiguous force. Or let us understand it this way – but first we should know what a sign is. A sign is a thing which indicates another thing , like traffic lights or sin-boards. Now suppose we are surrounded by different signs – signs related to our life, past , present or future , or even related to our feelings and moods. One might require a sharp eye and the observant nerve to detect such signs.

There was a curious case. The letter ‘M’ of my keyboard was not working well since god-knows-how many days. I never noticed it until few days ago that the guy’s name begins with letter ‘M’ with whom my engagement was broken a month ago … so could it be a sign that the guy with letter ‘M’ would not fit in my life? Or was it just a co-incidence. But I had been observing these queer ‘co-incidences’ lately and I don’t really think they are co-incidences.

One day my brother slept in my parent’s room (which happens rarely) and that time my sister was also at home and she was sleeping upstairs while I was in my own room and trying to sleep. Suddenly a vague feeling surrounded me. At that brief moment I felt that the future has been projected to me into a sign. The family was in one room – my brother and my parents while me and my sister who was sleeping in different rooms, had entirely separate lives to live. As the sign revealed itself slowly, the profound sense of future wrapped me up.

These signs, I think, do not come from outside. They may be our personal associations. They might not help to prevent a future blunder or tragedy but they can surely help to make you understand yourself and your surroundings better. 

Sunday, July 24, 2011

A poem

A poem – I knew
Grew up with me
Grew within me
And came out


One day.

And then there was a full stop.

Thursday, July 7, 2011


 Memory can change the shape of a room; it can change the color of a car. And memories can be distorted. They're just an interpretation, they're not a record, and they're irrele.......

This was a game. I just pasted the quote over here. The quote I loved. And distorted it by just blindly pressing the button - Backspace- for a few seconds and stopped. It stopped on irrelevant. So here is the word - IRRELEVANT.

What's relevant? What's irrelevant? Is my loving you relevant to you? Or my leaving is? Or the fact that I hate you is any relevant today? Is it relevant to you that I have some fears for myself? And that I might not utter them and die one day like everyone out there? Everything of yourself is Irrelevant to another person. Whether you Live or Die or just Disappear. Just memories linger about the space. And the memories which can be distorted , which dont have any definite shape. They are just interpretations. Like yourself. Irrelevant. Quite irrelevant.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Mid-Night Thought - Love











Mid-Night Thought

I have realized this lately , and can only utter now when I am half-awake , half-asleep. No one knows anyone here , in this world. My parents could not know each other. I don't know my brother , my sister , my friends. They all seem to me to be belonging to an unknown island. No one knows any one here... and when you think you have known someone , that person will be so generous to remind you that you are wrong. I s---- , this world is full of generous people. 

This is not a fairy's world. Not everything goes as you had dreamed. But still dreams are the stars of my eyes , and I can't afford losing them. They are all I have , they are only what is mine. 

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